while i was working through the guided meditation, a friend of mine kept coming to mind and all i could think about was how much she maybe needed this, and how much i wanted to share it with her. she's going through a really tough time right now and i don't get to see her as often as i would like. i kind of feel like a bad friend for leaving her behind and moving forward in my life. i don't regret it, but i do feel guilty about it sometimes. so i try to get back to see her whenever i can, and i don't feel like there's been anything i can do personally that has gotten through to her. maybe wendy can do it? anyway, the point is to pay it forward so that's the obvious solution to me.
on a more exciting note, i finished my last class assist yesterday and i am what i can only assume is days away from officially receiving my teaching certificate! i. am. excited. i remember talking to someone after i had finished the initial training portion of the actual training, and them telling me it seems like it went by so quick; like it wasn't really that hard. didn't i think it was going to be more difficult? take more time? i wanted to scream and cry and laugh and dance around the room because i had no idea how to respond to that. it was one of the most challenging experiences of my life thus far, and yeah it only took 4 months and some intensive training but NOT REALLY AT ALL THAT. everything else. it is something, i am beginning to understand, only those who have been through it truly understand. and maybe not even some of them. it was truly an experience that has changed me for the better, as all good experiences are intended to, i believe, and there is no way to adequately explain that in words. i just have to go on teaching and passing it on and around and forward and hopefully that will explain adequately what words cannot.
as far as the actual assisting, i was more comfortable in this class than i have ever been assisting so far. i'm sure that just comes with time, but also because i've now taught this class twice and am gearing up to take over the class for stephanie next week when she moves on to a new job and a new schedule that no longer allows for her to teach the class. she is someone that i will hold dear in my heart foreverrrr for thinking enough of me to recommend me this job, and kick starting my teacher life. i can only hope that the universe has something greater in store for her; she is a truly lovely person.
and also, on a somewhat related note, i hope that i can still assist classes from time to time because i kind of enjoy it! and it teaches me something new every time i step in to someone else's class.